Third place 2: Martha

OMG I AM SO AWESOME!!1!!LEVEN!!

(A Stumptuous Fitness Model Contest Entry)

I’ve been heavy my whole life, but while I did struggle with the usual body image issues that tend to come with being a big girl in a culture that doesn’t care much for big girls, for most of my life I felt ok with my big, strong body (I’m a nerd, so I was more focused on important, intellectual things like debating Kirk v. Picard and reading back-issues of X-Men). That changed in 2001 when, after months of sudden and mysteriously fluctuating illness, I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis.

Suddenly, my legs that had always seemed as sturdy and strong as tree trunks were just fat and useless and I had trouble even sitting up on my own. In a word: suck. So, I did a standard treatment deal: a couple of weeks of IV steroids in the hospital followed by prednisone taper at home. After a few months, I managed to get back a lot of the use of my body, but I also managed to gain a ridiculous amount of weight - between the inability to even walk for much of 2001 and the ravenous appetite I got from the steroids, I put on well over 100 pounds in less than a year. Double suck. The extra weight put on in so short a time made my MS-induced fatigue exponentially worse.

My doctor suggested I try to exercise in order to get my strength and energy back, but I was far too self-conscious to be seen sweating on a treadmill or clomping my way clumsily through an aerobics class. I was miserable.

However, I was (and continue to be) also lucky enough to be married to a big brawny bear of a man who, in addition to being loving and patient and all the other fabulous qualities one generally adores in a spouse, likes to lift weights. Observing my unhappiness with the decline of my health, he suggested that I join him in the weight room, a section of the gym where much-larger-than-average people tend to pass through unnoticed. I agreed.

The sense of relief I felt when I began to lift was the best medicine I’d had since getting diagnosed - here was proof that, in spite of all my fears to the contrary, my body really did still work. It was still strong, could become even stronger if I wanted it to. I began to lift regularly, pushing through fatigue and muscle aches and all the rest, and I started feeling better. My balance got better - no longer did I stagger about as though I’d gone on a malt liquor bender during lunch hour. My fatigue grew less oppressive - I’d be lying if I said it isn’t still a royal pain in the ass, but it’s better than it was before. I lost weight and started feeling more like myself again.

My accomplishments? Well, in the past year I have: benched 150 lbs. (personal best!), done an unassisted dip, pushed a king-sized mattress up a ridiculously narrow flight of stairs, carried a 40lb. bag of cat food over my shoulder for a mile, preached a gospel of weightlifting to any woman who would hear it, started doing overhead squats, helped way too many people move, done curls with slices of tree trunk in my grandpa’s yard, beaten several men at arm wrestling, graduated from college (summa cum laude!) and gotten 2 out of 3 in an axe-throwing contest. My cane gathers dust in the umbrella stand.

Weightlifting has, honestly, become one of the most loved activities in my life. It allows me to control my disease better than any medication ever did. It gives me a sense of accomplishment and power I never felt from using a stair climber. It’s a form of exercise that doesn’t feel like punishment for being too big - my Teutonic sturdiness is a virtue, rather than an embarrassment that needs correction. It encourages me to love my body. It is the rare activity that appeals both to my feminism and to my love of hurling large objects while yelling “RRRRRAAAAHHHH!!!” (or equivalent yell of manic satisfaction). It helps me stretch out the sleeves of my t-shirts better. It helps me feel like a badass.

martha

(Forgive the goofiness of the attached pictures - our gym doesn’t allow photography, so I just attached a pic of me attempting to purchase tickets to the gun show and another of me getting my learn on)